When Life Brings Hurt & Disappointment

When life isn’t working out the way you had hoped, disappointment and hurt can take over. That’s okay. Feel the disappointment, recognize and feel the hurt.

But then what?

How do you move past the pain?

You may start to feel like you can’t get past it, that you can’t deal with any more hurt. You may say to yourself, “I can’t do this.”

What I know personally, especially having gone through so much already, is that I can’t do it. I then remember that I’m not supposed to. It’s not my burden to carry because I have a relationship with my Heavenly Father. Instead of being mad at God for your situation, give it all over to Him. He loves you enough to take it on for you.

You might think, why is He doing this to me? First of all, He isn’t. He doesn’t cause our pain, but He does promise to be there with us to walk through it.

I actually heard a sermon the other day that offers another perspective as well, one that I hadn’t considered. He doesn’t cause the situations that bring us hurt. But, He may allow it. I had to stop and think on that for awhile.

It’s difficult to understand because we don’t know the end from the beginning like He does. He may allow something so that we turn to Him. He may allow something because there is something we need to learn or an area in which we need to grow. Sometimes it’s just a matter of timing. He may allow something, knowing that it’s all going to work out in the end, but it’s in His timing, His way.

So, when you are disappointed and hurt, when you don’t think you’re going to make it through the pain, when you don’t understand why things are happening the way they are…

Give it over to Him.

Take your hands off the situation, knowing it will all work out the way it’s supposed to. Don’t carry that burden. Be thankful that you have a loving Father that gave it all so that you don’t have to. That is called faith. Believe that He can and will carry you through. He will walk with you through it all, to the other side of it all.

I’m reminded of a horribly difficult time in my life, prior to my husband passing away. It was the time in my life that I learned what faith was really about. He taught me how to let things go, to Him.

I wrote about it last year and you can read that story here:

Letting Go

Although I write as I’m going through things, it is always my hope that it will help someone else. I truly hope that my sharing this does just that.

Joni 💗

Don’t Give Up

You may feel weak and tired. You may feel lost and alone. You may be losing hope that things will ever get better, that you will ever truly be happy.

Let me tell you, God sees you. He knows your heart, what you want and need. He hears the cries of your heart.

Your pain is not without purpose.

This is a temporary season.

God is working it all out as you walk through it.

Hang on.

Don’t give up.

Your breakthrough is coming.

He says, “I’m going to do a new thing.”

Just you wait and see.

Eternity

Poem I wrote 8/5/14

They say it gets easier, regardless of how you feel. Just be patient, your heart will heal. Give it time, that’s the only cure. Well, I keep waiting, I’m just not so sure. Every day that goes by, I miss you a little more. Everywhere I go, it’s you I look for. When I open my eyes each morning and when I close them every night, I expect for you to be there, right by my side. What does it really mean, to say you’re in my heart? Cause you took it with you; you had all of it from the start. With everything in me, I try to be okay. I try to be strong, keep going each day. But if I’m being honest, I’m putting on a brave face. Pretending to have faith, even when that’s not the case. Uncertainty is all I know for sure, it’s hard to see past today.

I’ll never stop asking, why you just couldn’t stay.

So time keeps on moving, but one thing will never change. A love like ours is forever and I can’t wait for that day. I think about it often, just how it will be.

I know I’ll run straight to you and we’ll start our eternity.

~ Joni Roberts Grief to Life

Gratefulness and Pain

I’m thankful that I know God. Without Him, there is no hope. Even through my darkest times, He has always been with me. There have been so many times where I felt like he had forgotten me and I was alone. Grief has a way of stealing ones joy and sense of security. The enemy feeds on the sadness and uses it to try and separate you from God and other people. God is showing me that He is the only thing, the only one, who can save me from the darkness.

The Pieces Don’t Fit Anymore

When you don’t fit where you used to, you grieve that like any other loss. But, if you don’t fit anymore, you don’t. Move forward. We aren’t supposed to have to fight for a place in people’s lives.

I was talking to one of my long time friends today and we were talking about regret or being able to go back and take certain things back. I told her that every little bit of our lives along the way, bad and good, make up where and who we are today.

When you feel like you don’t fit where you used to, it can take you to a really low place. It hurts! The thing to remember is; it’s not your fault, don’t stay there. Move forward knowing that God will place you where you fit, perfectly.

Is There Really a Choice?

I’ll be honest, there have been several times where I truly wanted to throat punch someone who said to me that happiness is a choice. I often thought to myself, “how in the world is it as easy as saying that I choose to be happy when I feel so bad?” I have even told myself several times, “just make a decision to be happy!”

Ugh, if only it were that easy!

It didn’t matter how many times I told myself that I was going to be happy, the weight of the reality I was facing and the feelings I felt weighed more in comparison to that choice.

I finally realized though, it really is as simple as making a choice. I can wake up each day and entertain all of the feelings I am faced with, all of the thoughts floating around in my head or, I could just tell myself that none of those things matter and it was going to be a good day. Now, I might have to tell myself that very same thing 20 times in that same day but, the attitude I was choosing was much better than the alternative!

Long story short, here is what I tell myself now: “Joni, you either trust God or you don’t.” So yeah, it’s not easy but I am making a conscious decision every day to put my trust in the one who actually has a say in what happens!

One day at a time. Sometimes, one hour or even, one minute at a time.

Tell me the reason…

I stumbled upon this article and it just honestly made my day. Take a minute to read it and then tell me, what do you think??

Dear Christians, Stop Saying “Everything Happens for a Reason”

This is us

This picture popped up today. If ever there was a picture that captured our little family, without words, this would be it.

We laughed. A lot. We smiled. A lot.

I sometimes look at old pictures and see the difference in our eyes and our smiles. They’ve changed. I see pictures or think of old memories and my heart is happy and I smile. But, it makes me so sad. Not just because we miss him so much, that’s a given. I miss those smiles on my children. The real, genuine, and innocent smiles. I’m sad because of the pain and struggle they have experienced as children. It makes me mad because I feel like they have been cheated. I do believe with all my heart that God will restore their hearts and bring real joy back into their lives but, it still makes me sad. That’s how I feel today and that’s okay.

Sure, there were the normal family downs and we surely had our share of struggles but this… This is us.

Be Still

I’ve been pretty quiet lately. There is a lot going on in my life; a lot of changes. In the midst of the chaos I am finding myself and allowing my faith to be reconstructed. It was necessary to step away from things as I knew them, especially spiritually. From a distance I was able to look at things with different eyes; to see things as they really were.

I will share more about that process later but for now it’s simply time to, be still.